Twas a few days days before Christmas,

When all through the house,

Not a creature was ready, not even a mouse,

There were no stockings by the chimney so bare,

And no thoughts that Santa would ever be there.

**********

The children were outside, not snug in their beds,

No visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.

Mamma lost her ‘kerchief, and I also in my cap,

Our brains were not ready for a long winter’s nap.

**********

Then out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

So I sprang to the window to see what was the matter.

Gazing out through the window I saw in a flash,

The spirit of Austin, Princess, that is a fact.

TO BE CONTINUED?

I saw a lone figure, a shadowy sight,
While walking the woods one dark wintry night,
So I quickened my pace and hurried my step,
To escape its attention and forget we had met.

The mysterious figure following my route,
Shadowing my steps, copying my truth,
Never let up despite my great pains,
To escape its attention and break free of its reign.

Minutes passed, hours and then days,
Weeks followed by months and years deathly grey,
Until one dark wintry night while walking the same wood,
I confronted the thing that held onto my truth.

Having prevailed over fear, I could see what it was,
An angel, a guardian angel, sent down from above,
Then it opened its wings, showing me the light of my life,
And I welcomed it into my soul with delight.

Cranky Old Man

(By Phyllis McCormick; adapted by Dave Griffith)

What do you see nurses? . . .. . .What do you see?
What are you thinking .. . when you’re looking at me?
A cranky old man, . . . . . .not very wise,
Uncertain of habit .. . . . . . . .. with faraway eyes?
Who dribbles his food .. . … . . and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice . .’I do wish you’d try!’
Who seems not to notice . . .the things that you do.
And forever is losing . . . . . .. . . A sock or shoe?
Who, resisting or not . . . … lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . . . .The long day to fill?
Is that what you’re thinking?. .Is that what you see?

Is it Christmas or Xmas, that’s what I say,
Beit Christmas or Xmas; it’s such a wonderful day,
With pressies and drinkies and all of that stuff,
Christmas or Xmas doesn’t bother me much.

At Christmas Everyone Loves a Sprout

Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there’s no such thing as Santa
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe

She’d been drinkin’ too much egg nog
And we’d begged her not to go
But she’d left her medication
So she stumbled out the door into the snow

When they found her Christmas mornin’
At the scene of the attack
There were hoof prints on her forehead
And incriminatin’ Claus marks on her back

Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walkin’ home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there’s no such thing as Santa
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe

Now were all so proud of Grandpa
He’s been takin’ this so well
See him in there watchin’ football
Drinkin’ beer and playin’ cards with cousin Belle

Bankers, greedy bankers,

Hoist them up high,

Burn them on bonfires,

For all of their lies,

Dance around the bonfires,

Glory in their pain,

And when you have done it,

DO IT AGAIN!

**************

He thought he saw a politician,

Who lived the perfect life,

He looked again, and saw it was,

A huge, humongous lie .

That’s it, he said, I realise,

The foolishness of life.

It’s a mess

He thought he saw an honest man,

Within the parliament,

He looked again, and saw it was,

Another bloated blimp.

Unless they leave this house,” he said,

There’ll be no hope, I think.”

It’s a real mess!

He thought he saw a banker man,

Who made an honest buck,

He looked again, and saw he was,

Entwined in all the muck.

If I were king, he said,

His head would be on the block.

It’s a terrible mess!

He thought…

I am a Cat, it said smiling at her,

A Cheshire Cat, you can tell by my fur,

My paws and whiskers are also a hint,

But the smile on my face is most significant.

*

I can see by your fur, said Alice – I do,

And also your paws and whiskers – it’s true,

But that smile on your face has me all in a tizz,

Coming and going in such a whiz.

*

Still smiling at Alice, the Cat dryly replied,

You’d never believe me; you’d think I had lied,

If the smile on my face was gone – it’s a fact,

No one would listen or look at this Cat.

*

Without offering Alice the chance to reply,

The Cat went on with his horrible lie,

Creeping closer and closer, until ever so near,

When he pounced, lashed out, cutting her ear.

*

Feeling the hurt…

Tomorrow will be cold, that is for sure,

Colder than cold; it will be quite raw,

Oh, what will I do, first and foremost,

Make a snowman or fight with balls of the stuff?

I will just have wait and hope its enough,

Be it two inches of snow or two feet of the stuff,

If it’s not very high I will go to work, though its far,

Driving carefully along in my Austin Princess car.

,

Then again I might stay home and make pray,

Thanking God for the white gift ‘cos it don’t happen every day.

See ya!

Guy Fawkes Night is coming; the ghouls are getting fat,
Please do put a penny in the old Guy’s hat,
If you haven’t got a penny, a ha’penny will do,
If you haven’t got a ha’penny, then we’ll get YOU!