Category Archives: Aliens

Aliens Have Landed!

Aliens landed in Ballykilduff,

Aliens landed; that is a fact,

In the dark of the night it happened, it did,

At the end of my garden they landed, then hid.

 

Breda, dear Breda, wake up, will you please?

Something is happening; I am all in a tizz!

Leave me alone, she answered, I’m beat,

With those words on her lips she fell fast asleep.

 

Donning my gown and slippers I left,

Her sleeping soundly as into the kitchen I crept,

Taking hold of light; the torch, my best friend,

Into the garden I stealthily went.

 

Along the path, man and light progressed,

Over the fence, into the field with its guests,

Pointing my torch at some little green men,

I saw aliens a plenty around a spaceship broken.

 

What are they doing? I said far too loud,

Signalling my place, my location – and how,

Pointing their guns, the aliens zapped me with rays,

Blue, yellow and green, orange and grey.

 

Thinking my time was finished, all gone,

I fell to the ground, awaiting the anon,

Sorry about that, one of them said, helping me up

We thought you were a cow, wanting to eat us all up

 

What are you doing? I asked, with curious eyes,

Seeing them cutting the grass, taking it inside,

We are refuelling our spaceship, he told me quite proud,

We get one light year per armful, he said out aloud.

 

That’s amazing, I said, can I go see inside?

Sorry, he answered, it’s too small for your like,

Laughing, I asked if there was anything they need,

Yes, he told me forthrightly, can we have some tea?

 

Tea? I asked, you drink tea way up there,

In outer space, with its atmosphere rare?

No, silly, he replied, it’s to pour down our boots,

We never travel with them empty, forsooth.

 

You pour tea down your boots? I laughed out loud,

What does it do, make you fly like a bird?

It does, he told me, how did you know that?

Was your mother or father an alien, or even the cat?

 

Just then I heard something, someone calling to me,

Gerrard, wake up, its morning; here is your tea,

Opening my eyes, I saw Breda my wife,

Offering the cup of plenty, tea of my life.

 

Where are my boots? I asked, still half sleep,

I want them, I need them; oh where are they please?

They are under the bed, here, she said, offering them to me,

Why do you want them before drinking your tea?

 

Accepting my boots, I poured in the tea,

What on earth are you doing? she asked warily,

I don’t go anywhere, I told her, without filling them first,

Can I have another cup, I asked, because I sure have a thirst.

 

The moral of my story is this:

Don’t go anyway to Ballykilduff, give it a miss,

Things are happening in spaceships; it’s true,

Aliens aplenty are waiting for YOU.

free ebooks

 

Albert Einstein Talks About Aliens

Albert Einstein talks about aliens – really!

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff,
Aliens landed; that is a fact,
In the dark of the night it happened, it did,
At the end of my garden they landed, then hid.

Breda, dear Breda, wake up, will you please?
Something is happening, and I am all in a tizz!
Leave me alone, she answered, I’m beat,
With those words on her lips, she fell fast asleep.

Donning my gown and slippers I left,
Her sleeping soundly as into the kitchen I crept,
Searching for light; a torch, my best friend,
Then into the garden I stealthily went.

Down the long garden, man and torch progressed,
Then i climbed over the fence, into the field with its guests,
Pointing my torch at the little green men,
I saw Aliens a plenty around a flying saucer, broken.

What are they doing? I mused out aloud,
Signalling my place, my location — and how,
Pointing their guns, the Aliens zapped me with rays,
Blue, yellow, green, orange and grey.

Thinking my time was finished, all gone,
I fell to the ground, awaiting the final anon,
Sorry about that, one of them said, helping me up,
We thought you were a cow, wanting to gobble us up.

What are you doing? I asked, with curious eyes,
Seeing them cutting grass, then taking it inside,
We are refuelling our spaceship, he told me aloud,
We get a light year per armful, he told me so proud.

That’s amazing, I said, can I go see inside?
Sorry, he answered, it’s too small for your like,
Laughing, I said, is there anything you need?
Yes, he told me forthrightly, can we have some tea?

Tea? I asked, you drink tea way up there,
In outer space with its atmosphere rare?
No, silly, he replied, it’s to pour down our boots,
We never travel with them empty — it’s the truth.

You pour tea down your boots? I laughed aloud,
What does it do, make you fly like a bird?
It does, he answered, how did you know that fact?
Was your mother or father an alien, or even the cat?

Just then I heard something, someone calling to me,
Gerrard, wake up, its morning; here is your tea,
Opening my eyes, I saw Breda my wife,
Offering the cup of plenty, tea; it’s my life.

Where are my boots? I asked, still half sleep,
I want them, I need them; oh where are they please?
They are under the bed, here, she said, offering them to me,
Why do you want them before drinking your tea?

Accepting the boots, I poured in the tea,
What on earth are you doing? she asked warily,
I don’t go anywhere, I told her, without filling them first,
Can I have another cup, I asked, because I sure have a thirst.

The moral of my story is this:
Avoid Ballykilduff, give it a miss,
For strange things are happening there,
Aliens in boots filled with tea, fixing their flying saucer, so rare.

Little green Man

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff

Little green Man

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff

Aliens landed in Ballykilduff,
Aliens landed; that is a fact,
In the dark of the night it happened, it did,
At the end of my garden they landed, then hid.

Breda, dear Breda, wake up, will you please?
Something is happening and I am all in a tizz!
Leave me alone, she answered, I’m beat,
Having said that to me she fell fast asleep.

Donning my gown and slippers I left,
Her sleeping in bed as into the kitchen I crept,
Searching for light, the torch, my best friend,
I opened the door and into the garden I went.

Towards the end of the garden with my torch I progressed,
Then I climbed over the fence into the field with its guests,
Pointing my torch, I rained light upon them,
Aliens a plenty around a spaceship humming.

What are they doing? I wondered out loud,
Signalling my place, my location – and how,
Pointing their guns, the Aliens zapped me with rays,
Blue, yellow and green, orange and grey.

Thinking my time was finished, all gone,
I fell to the ground awaiting the anon,
Sorry about that, one of them said helping me up
We thought you were a cow wanting to eat us all up

What are you doing? I asked with curious eyes,
Seeing them cutting the grass, then taking it inside,
We are refuelling our spaceship, he told me quite proud,
We get one light year per armful, he said out aloud.

That’s amazing, I said, can I go see inside?
Sorry, he answered, it’s too small for your like,
Laughing, I asked if there was anything they need,
Yes, he told me forthrightly, can we have some tea?

Tea? I asked, you drink tea way up there,
In outer space, with its atmosphere rare?
No, silly, he replied, it’s to pour down our boots,
We never travel with them empty, forsooth.

You pour tea down your boots? I laughed out loud,
What does it do, make you fly like a bird?
It does, he told me, how did you know that?
Was your mother or father an alien, or even your cat?

Just then I heard something, someone calling to me,
Gerrard, wake up, its morning; here is your tea,
Opening my eyes, I saw Breda, my wife,
Offering the cup of plenty, tea; it’s my life.

Where are my boots? I asked, still half sleep,
I want them, I need them; oh where are they please?
They are under the bed, here, she said, offering them to me,
Why do you want them before drinking your tea?

Accepting my boots, I poured in the tea,
What on earth are you doing? she asked warily,
I don’t go anywhere without filling them first,
Can I have another cup, I asked, because I sure have a thirst.

The moral of my story is this:
Don’t go anyway near Ballykilduff, GIVE IT A MISS,
Strange things are happening down that neck of the woods,
Like Aliens, and Slugs driving campervans – and Fiats to boot.

Buy this exciting new eBook today.

It’s only 99 cents!

 

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff – 99 cents eBook

Little green Man

Buy this exciting new eBook TODAY!

(It’s only 99 cents)

CLICK HERE TO VISIT MY ONLINE BOOK SHOP

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff eBook

Aliens Landed in Ballykilduff

Aliens landed in Ballykilduff,

Aliens landed; that is a fact,

In the dark of the night it happened – it did,

At the end of my garden they landed, then hid.

*

Breda, dear Breda, wake up, will you please?

Something is happening; I am all in a tizz!

Leave me alone, she answered, because I am beat,

With those words on her lips, she fell fast asleep.

*

Donning my gown and slippers I left,

Her sleeping so soundly as into the kitchen I crept,

Searching for light; the torch, my best friend,

Then into the garden I stealthily went.

*

Down the long garden, man and torch progressed,

Then I climbed over the fence, into the field with its guests,

Pointing my torch at little grey men,

I saw Aliens a plenty around a UFO, broken.

*

What are they doing? I wondered out loud,

Signalling my place, my location – and how,

Pointing their guns, the Aliens zapped me with rays,

Blue, yellow and green, orange and grey.

*

Thinking my time was finished, all gone,

I fell to the ground, awaiting the anon,

Sorry about that, one of them said, helping me up

We thought you were a cow, wanting to gobble us up.

*

What are you doing? I asked, with curious eyes,

Seeing them cutting the grass and taking it inside,

We are refuelling our spaceship, he told me quite proud,

We get one light year per armful, he said out aloud.

*

That’s amazing, I said, can I see inside?

Sorry, he answered, it’s too small for your like,

Laughing, I asked if there was anything the need,

Yes, he told me forthrightly, can we have some tea?

*

Tea? I asked him, you drink tea way up there,

In outer space, with its atmosphere rare?

No, silly, he replied it’s to pour down our boots,

We never travel with them empty, forsooth.

*

You pour tea down your boots? I laughed out loud,

What does it do, make you fly like a bird?

It does, he told me, how did you know that?

Was your mother or father an alien, or even your cat?

*

Just then I heard something, someone calling to me,

Gerrard, wake up, its morning; here is your tea,

Opening my eyes, I saw Breda, my wife,

Offering the cup of plenty, tea, my life,

*

Where are my boots? I asked her, though still half sleep,

I want them, I need them; oh where are they please?

They are under the bed, here, she said offering them to me,

Why do you want them before drinking you tea?

*

Accepting my boots, I poured in the tea,

What on earth are you doing? she asked warily,

I don’t go anywhere, I told her, without filling them first,

Can I have another cup, I asked, because I sure have a thirst.

*

The moral of my story is this:

Don’t go anyway near Ballykilduff, GIVE IT A MISS,

For strange things are going on down that neck of the woods,

Like Aliens driving campervans – and Fiats, to boot,

*****************************

sparkClick HERE to visit my online book shop,

where you can purchase my eBooks

**********

SOME PEOPLE CALL ME THE NEW ROALD DAHL.

I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU CALL ME

AS LONG AS YOU ENJOY READING MY STORIES.

Some people call me the New Roald Dahl...

There was a Young Man called Sam

There was a young man called Sam,

Who decided to live in a pan,

Then one day will at home,

He was burned to the bone,

When he mother fried eggs in that pan,

**********

Click HERE to visit my online book shop,

where you can purchase my eBooks

**********

 

I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU CALL ME

AS LONG AS YOU ENJOY READING MY STORIES.

Albert Einstein Talks About Aliens

Albert Einstein Talks About Aliens ; that is a fact.

Merry Christmas – or should that be Merry Princessmas?

Merry Christmas

Or should that be Merry Princessmas?

***********************

Stories for children and young at heart adults.

Bolf was a Troll; and he had a little bag

Bolf was a troll, and he had a little bag,

And he filled it up with trash, trash, trash;

Then he looked inside, and said to himself,

What a fine haul, what a stash, stash, stash.

***************

When he brought it home to his troll wife Joan,

And he told her to look inside, side, side,

She gazed in the bag and sang out with joy,

Such a fine stash of trash, trash, trash.

***************

Then they both sat down and ate the fine meal,

The very best meal they had, had, had, had.

The junk and the trash, and the tins and the crass,

Eaten with relish were soon gone, gone, gone.

***************

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