RSS

Category Archives: fantasy story

Little Red Riding Hood


Little Red Riding Hood and the Dalek

Chapter One: The Basket of Cakes

Once upon a time, there lived a cheerful little girl who wore a cloak the colour of bright cherries, with a hood that framed her round face. Because she wore it so often, the neighbours called her Little Red Riding Hood.

One fine morning, her mother packed a basket with cakes, butter, and a flask of hot chocolate.
“Take these to your grandmother, dear,” she said. “She has not been well. But remember—stay on the path. And don’t talk to strangers.”

Little Red Riding Hood promised she would be good, although she was secretly curious about the forest. She kissed her mother’s cheek, hoisted her basket, and set off humming into the green, leafy world.

What she did not know was that a strange new visitor had arrived in the forest—a creature made of shining metal, whose voice echoed like thunder.


Chapter Two: The Stranger in the Woods

The path twisted beneath tall oaks. Birds should have been singing, but they were silent. Even the squirrels kept to their holes.

Suddenly, there came a grinding, wheezing noise, followed by a screech:
“IDENTIFY! IDENTIFY!”

Red stopped in her tracks. Before her stood something unlike any fox, wolf, or bear. It was shaped like a giant pepperpot, plated in bronze and gold, with a single glowing eye.

“I—I’m Little Red Riding Hood,” she stammered. “Who are you?”

“I—AM—A—DALEK!” the creature boomed. “WHERE—ARE—YOU—GOING?”

“To visit my grandmother in her cottage, with cakes and hot chocolate.”

The Dalek’s dome swivelled. “WHERE—IS—THE—COTTAGE?”

Red pointed, still polite though her knees were shaking. “Over the hill, through the glade, by the old stone well.”

Without another word, the Dalek spun round and rolled away, faster than seemed possible.


Chapter Three: The Cottage in Danger

Grandmother’s cottage was small, with roses round the door and a chimney that puffed like a kettle. Inside, the poor woman was knitting by the fire when—CRASH!—her door burst open.

The Dalek burst in, screeching:
“EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!”

Granny dropped her knitting and dived under the bed. The Dalek considered blasting her to pieces but then remembered a half-broken file in its databank titled “HUMAN FAIRY STORIES: STRATEGIC USE.”

“NEW STRATEGY: DECEPTION!” it bellowed. With difficulty, it plucked Granny’s nightcap with its plunger and balanced it on its dome. Then it reversed awkwardly into her bed, pulling the blanket up to its grille.

The disguise was… questionable.


Chapter Four: “What Big Lights You Have!”

Little Red Riding Hood soon arrived, her basket swinging. She pushed open the cottage door, surprised that it hung off its hinges.

Inside was smoke, scorch marks, and splintered wood. But on the bed lay her “grandmother,” strangely lumpy under the quilt.

“Oh, Grandmother, what bright blue lights you have!”

“THE BETTER—TO—SEE YOU WITH!” screeched the Dalek.

“Oh, Grandmother, what a terrible voice you have!”

“THE BETTER—TO—COMMAND YOUR EXTERMINATION WITH!”

And with that, the Dalek threw off the quilt, cap flying, and aimed its death-ray straight at Little Red Riding Hood.


Chapter Five: The Hot Chocolate Surprise

hot chocolate surprise

Red gasped. She stumbled backward, clutching her basket. In her fright, the flask of hot chocolate slipped from her hands. The lid popped, and steaming cocoa splashed across the Dalek’s grille.

Instantly, sparks flew.
“WARNING! COCOA—INTRUSION! CIRCUITRY COMPROMISED!”

The Dalek spun in circles, smashing Granny’s dresser, knocking over the kettle, and shouting, “MALFUNCTION! MALFUNCTION!”

With one last fizzing shriek, it toppled into the fireplace, where sparks and smoke finished the job. The Dalek went silent, its single eye fading to black.


Chapter Six: Safe at Last

safe at last

From under the bed, Grandmother crawled out, trembling but alive.
“Oh, my dear child!” she cried. “You have saved me—from that dreadful… whatever-it-was!”

Little Red Riding Hood smiled shyly. “It seems hot chocolate can defeat more than just a cold day.”

They sat together, nibbling cakes and drinking what cocoa remained. And though the cottage was rather scorched and in need of repair, both were glad to be alive.


Epilogue: The Moral

From that day forth, Little Red Riding Hood never wandered through the forest without a flask of hot chocolate, just in case. And the villagers told the story for generations: how a girl in a red cloak defeated a terrifying Dalek with nothing more than kindness, quick thinking, and a very sticky drink.

Moral: Even the smallest comforts can triumph over the greatest terrors.

 

Tags: , , , , ,

The Ballykillduff Daleks Winter of Madness

The Ballykillduff Daleks Winter of Madness

The first frost of winter came sneaking into Ballykillduff one quiet night. It crept over the hedgerows like icing on a Christmas cake, decorated the village pump with shiny icicles, and froze the puddles so hard that even Bridget McGillicuddy’s hens slipped about like ballerinas on roller skates.

The Ballykillduff Daleks had never experienced such a thing. For weeks they had been trundling around the village, muttering about “TOTAL DOMINATION” and “EX-TER-MI-NATION,” but on this particular morning they emerged from their shed only to discover that their mighty treads were no match for frozen mud.

One Dalek gave a mighty shove forward.
“COMMENCING DAILY PATROL!” it announced grandly—then immediately skidded sideways and lodged itself in the ditch.

Another Dalek rolled confidently onto a glittering puddle.
“THESE HUMANS ARE WEAK! WE SHALL—AAAAAGH!” it screeched, spinning in helpless circles like a saucepan lid on polished tiles.

By the time Councillor McGroggan wandered down the lane with his bucket of coal, he found half a dozen Daleks floundering about, their eyestalks fogged with frost, their plungers stuck fast to frozen gates, and one unfortunate unit still wedged headfirst in the ditch.

Click on the link, below, to read the full, bonkers mad story.

The Ballykillduff Daleks Winter of Madness

 

 

 

Tags: , , ,

Dullingshire

Dullingshire

A Short Story: The Girl with the Purple Umbrella

There once was a girl named Lila who strolled through town with a purple umbrella—always open, even on the sunniest of days. She wore socks that didn’t match, spoke in rhymes when no one asked, and could often be found conversing with lamp posts or feeding imaginary pigeons.

People in the town of Dullingshire whispered.
“She’s strange,” said the baker.
“Weird,” nodded the barber.
“Completely off,” murmured the mayor.
“Possibly crazy,” concluded the postman.

One day, a curious boy named Felix asked her why she did the things she did. She twirled her umbrella, smiled, and said:
“I’m not strange, weird, off, nor crazy—
My reality is just different from yours, dear Daisy.”

“My name’s Felix,” he corrected.

“Exactly,” she winked.

She invited him to walk with her. Under her umbrella, the world looked different—full of colour, music, and upside-down rainbows. Trees whispered secrets, puddles shimmered like portals, and the clouds giggled above.

By the time they returned, Felix wasn’t sure whether he had visited another world or simply looked at his own for the first time. He tried explaining it to others, but they shook their heads and gave him cautious glances. He didn’t care.

From that day on, Felix carried a green balloon wherever he went and sometimes whistled at flowers to see if they’d sing back.

And when people whispered about him, Lila simply smiled and said,
“Welcome to my reality.”

And that’s how the world became a little less dull, and Dullingshire never quite lived up to its name again.

dullingshire

 
 

Tags: , , , , , ,

Alice Logs In

Alice Logs In

Alice Logs In

One sunny day in Wonderland,
While sipping tea and chewing sand,
Young Alice yawned and had a thought:
“Why are we all so pre-internet caught?”

She pulled an iPhone from her sock,
(It ticked and tocked like a talking clock),
She poked the screen and gave a grin—
“Let’s see what world I’ve wandered in!”

The Caterpillar popped online:
“Who R U? U up? U fine?”
The Cheshire Cat just posted memes,
And vanished mid-conspiracy themes.

The Hatter live-streamed tea debates,
With Bonkers takes on interest rates.
The Queen of Hearts launched NFTs:
“Buy now! Each comes with severed knees!”

Alice sighed. “This can’t be right—
We’ve meme’d away the day and night.
No riddles, rhymes, no flights of fancy—
Just trolls and ads and apps called ‘Dancy.’”

She tried to post: “I miss the trees.”
But all she got were angry bees—
Replies that buzzed: “You’re cringe! You’re fake!”
“Return to hole! Go eat a cake!”

She shut the phone and dropped it fast,
Deciding screen life couldn’t last.
She skipped away through mushroom mist,
Her Twitter never once was missed.

So if you find your world askew,
Try Wonderland, not Webpage 2.
You won’t need likes or streams or fame—
Just talking cats who know your name.

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

32nd December.

32nd December.

If you liked Harry Potter you will love this story
As I sat uneasily atop my hound-horse, a large and fast animal as much greyhound as horse, I slipped my left hand into my jacket pocket and felt the cold steel of my trusty old lighter. Grasping tightly securing it in my sweating palm I carefully removed it from my suit pocket exposing the shiny metal to the bright rays of sunlight. My eyes, looking down onto my now open hand, squinted as the reflected rays tore away in several distinct directions, and my fingers clutched its familiar presence ever tighter. It was only a common and ever so ordinary cigarette lighter, but I felt an affinity with it; like that of an old friend. I ran my fingers along it, like petting an dog, then suddenly an almighty crack of thunder exploding directly overhead, in a tempestuous fury, brought my attention back to the task in hand the outcome of which promised life or death to each and everyone of us. So, without further ado, I cleared my mind and began speaking. I began reciting words, words which had only seconds earlier entered my tired brain, I said…”

“I hold this item in this my hand
To act as a bridge in these our plans
We need a distraction, a disturbance right now
To help Kakuri and the HU BA HOU.”

“No sooner had I finished speaking, and the last word left my lips, the sky began to darken. The dark clouds, appearing from nowhere, grew larger and larger and blacker and blacker until they had joined together in one congealed mass of undiluted anger. In a few short minutes the sky had changed from a deep summer blue to a black so dark day had turned into night.
Some of the assembled hound-horses sidestepped nervously, their handlers struggling to calm them. The wind began to blow, soft at first, but increasingly stronger. Then the heavens, opening in a deluge of rain, spewed thunder and lightning the likes of which I had never before seen; a storm, a full-blown storm was upon us.”
“And a storm was exactly what Kakuri needed. Through the driving rain, speaking directly to the HU BA HOU, she said, ‘Now my friend, it’s up to you – do your best.’ And with those words still lingering in its cavernous ears the huge animal took off at full-gallop heading straight for the Timeless Gates guarding the walled city of Onisha. The animal, sensing this was the final offensive, kept its large heavyset and armour-plated head well down. The storm now so intense Kakuri had, after only a few seconds, lost all sense of direction. She had no way of knowing if she was still on course, all she could do was trust the HU BA HOU, and hold on for dear life.”
“As if that were not enough for me to be worried about Kiliki had, meanwhile, given the order to the impatient, assembled Onishians to attack. And who could blame their impatience? It was their land, and they wanted revenge! The entire rag-tag collection of Onishians and their assorted animals plus the Orlu (a separate race of small ever obliging speedy people) were now hot on Kakuri’s heels with no intention of being left behind in the middle of nowhere, and in such a terrible storm. Soaked to the skin they all rushed headlong into the unknown. Some shouted, others roared and still others screamed with the delight they felt rising up against the man who had promised so much, who had given so little and who taken everything.”
“I could see the huge beast’s armour-plated defences, which had, only hours earlier, been carefully crafted by the ingenious Orlu, sparkling brilliantly in the reflected lightning flashes. The plates, of every conceivable shape and size, colliding with one another clanged loudly in a surreal musical tempo, and if there was anybody, within the walled city, still capable of seeing through the blinding, driving rain they would have been filled with the fear of God.
Suddenly, just short of the still-defiant gates, the HU BA HOU stopped. We all stopped dead in our tracks, wondering just what could be the problem. Then the tank, the ugly humpy-tank of an animal, clawing at the ground (like a bull), rising on its hind legs (like a horse) while roaring its own unique ear-shattering cry lifted its large, ugly head one last time before hurling itself forward with the gates set firmly in its sights, nothing could stop it now…”

“Watching, from the relative safety of a short distance behind, my mind wandered trying to remember how this had all come about. Why, only a few days earlier I had been all set for Christmas. I remembered sitting comfortably in front on the TV, looking forward to a well-earned rest. And now, here I was in an alien land about to follow a fair maiden atop an abomination of a creature called a HU BA HOU in an assault on a walled city, searching for a man called Miafra – for a man who would be a god. Searching for a man who had stopped time, stolen the chi (the free will) of the people and drained the powers of the most revered Mystic in the entire land. My thoughts, racing, drifted back to Christmas Eve those few short days ago…”

fantasy story

eBooks for children; fantasy stories.

 

Tags: , ,

Hat Cat Hat

There once was a man with a hat,

Who wanted to have a pet cat,

So he called his hat cat,

Then gave it a pat,

The hat he thinks is a cat.

 

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on September 12, 2017 in cat, fantasy story, funny story

 

Tags: ,

Marilyn Manson- You’re So Vain ft. Johnny Depp

Marilyn Manson- You’re So Vain ft. Johnny Depp

 
 

Tags: ,

32nd December, for sure.

32nd December.
As I sat uneasily atop my hound-horse, a large and fast animal as much greyhound as horse, I slipped my left hand into my jacket pocket and felt the cold steel of my trusty old lighter. Grasping tightly securing it in my sweating palm I carefully removed it from my suit pocket exposing the shiny metal to the bright rays of sunlight. My eyes, looking down onto my now open hand, squinted as the reflected rays tore away in several distinct directions, and my fingers clutched its familiar presence ever tighter. It was only a common and ever so ordinary cigarette lighter, but I felt an affinity with it; like that of an old friend. I ran my fingers along it, like petting an dog, then suddenly an almighty crack of thunder exploding directly overhead, in a tempestuous fury, brought my attention back to the task in hand the outcome of which promised life or death to each and everyone of us. So, without further ado, I cleared my mind and began speaking. I began reciting words, words which had only seconds earlier entered my tired brain, I said…”

“I hold this item in this my hand
To act as a bridge in these our plans
We need a distraction, a disturbance right now
To help Kakuri and the HU BA HOU.”

“No sooner had I finished speaking, and the last word left my lips, the sky began to darken. The dark clouds, appearing from nowhere, grew larger and larger and blacker and blacker until they had joined together in one congealed mass of undiluted anger. In a few short minutes the sky had changed from a deep summer blue to a black so dark day had turned into night.
Some of the assembled hound-horses sidestepped nervously, their handlers struggling to calm them. The wind began to blow, soft at first, but increasingly stronger. Then the heavens, opening in a deluge of rain, spewed thunder and lightning the likes of which I had never before seen; a storm, a full-blown storm was upon us.”
“And a storm was exactly what Kakuri needed. Through the driving rain, speaking directly to the HU BA HOU, she said, ‘Now my friend, it’s up to you – do your best.’ And with those words still lingering in its cavernous ears the huge animal took off at full-gallop heading straight for the Timeless Gates guarding the walled city of Onisha. The animal, sensing this was the final offensive, kept its large heavyset and armour-plated head well down. The storm now so intense Kakuri had, after only a few seconds, lost all sense of direction. She had no way of knowing if she was still on course, all she could do was trust the HU BA HOU, and hold on for dear life.”
“As if that were not enough for me to be worried about Kiliki had, meanwhile, given the order to the impatient, assembled Onishians to attack. And who could blame their impatience? It was their land, and they wanted revenge! The entire rag-tag collection of Onishians and their assorted animals plus the Orlu (a separate race of small ever obliging speedy people) were now hot on Kakuri’s heels with no intention of being left behind in the middle of nowhere, and in such a terrible storm. Soaked to the skin they all rushed headlong into the unknown. Some shouted, others roared and still others screamed with the delight they felt rising up against the man who had promised so much, who had given so little and who taken everything.”
“I could see the huge beast’s armour-plated defences, which had, only hours earlier, been carefully crafted by the ingenious Orlu, sparkling brilliantly in the reflected lightning flashes. The plates, of every conceivable shape and size, colliding with one another clanged loudly in a surreal musical tempo, and if there was anybody, within the walled city, still capable of seeing through the blinding, driving rain they would have been filled with the fear of God.
Suddenly, just short of the still-defiant gates, the HU BA HOU stopped. We all stopped dead in our tracks, wondering just what could be the problem. Then the tank, the ugly humpy-tank of an animal, clawing at the ground (like a bull), rising on its hind legs (like a horse) while roaring its own unique ear-shattering cry lifted its large, ugly head one last time before hurling itself forward with the gates set firmly in its sights, nothing could stop it now…”

“Watching, from the relative safety of a short distance behind, my mind wandered trying to remember how this had all come about. Why, only a few days earlier I had been all set for Christmas. I remembered sitting comfortably in front on the TV, looking forward to a well-earned rest. And now, here I was in an alien land about to follow a fair maiden atop an abomination of a creature called a HU BA HOU in an assault on a walled city, searching for a man called Miafra – for a man who would be a god. Searching for a man who had stopped time, stolen the chi (the free will) of the people and drained the powers of the most revered Mystic in the entire land. My thoughts, racing, drifted back to Christmas Eve those few short days ago…”

 

Tags:

Fantastic Beasts and where to find them

Fantastic Beasts and where to find them,

That’s the aim and conundrum,

For they are keen and magical too,

And if not careful they will get you.

*

So when you set off with wand in hand,

Make sure it’s primed with magical rhymes,

For as sure as night follows each day,

You will need that magic to get your way.

*

And if you do, if you kill those beasts,

And make the world safe from gruesome deeds,

Don’t you forget how many there are,

Waiting, just waiting to strike from afar.

And where to find them

Fantastic Beats and where to find them

 

Tags:

Reilly, the Slug

There once was a slug called Reilly,

Who was incredibly slimy,

He thought he was smart,

Going out in the dark,

Until he fell down in a hole, did Reilly.

While stuck in that dark place,

Reilly thought about his life and his fate,

About the jerk he had been,

To everyone he had seen,

So he promised to be good, did Reilly.

Suddenly, a stick falling into the hole,

Presented a way to escape from it all,

Freed from that space,

Reilly forgot his promise, though great.

And returned to his bad ways, did Reilly.

One day when Reilly was alone,

He forgot to cover up his dank home,

It was an incredibly hot day,

The sun shone brightly away,

Drying him up, that slug, old Reilly,

The moral of my story is this,

Treat everyone you meet with a wish,

That their life is just fine,

Untroubled by lying and slime,

Don’t end up like silly old Reilly.

reilly-the-slug

 
1 Comment

Posted by on October 12, 2016 in fantasy, fantasy story, humour

 

Tags: ,