Bolf the troll fell in a hole,
He fell in a hole,
While walking one day,
While walking one day,
Not looking the way,
The way he was going.
What a silly old troll.
Category Archives: funny story
Bolf fell in a Hole
There was an old man with a hat…
There was an old man with a hat,
Who was confused and thought it a cat,
So he gave it some meat and milk as a treat,
Then he put it outside for a crap.
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A Life in the Poo
Good times are coming, I know they are near,
The best times, for sure, in a number of years;
I’m counting each day on my fingers and thumbs,
Until the recession has passed and the bad times have gone.
Then, when the money is flowing again,
I will thank those people, both women and men,
Who stood up to the bankers and politicians; it’s true,
That saved us, how they saved us, from a life in the poo.
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Be Careful What You Wish For
Arnie the apple hung from a tree
in an orchard a mile wide.
And every day the pickers would come
and haul dozens of apples inside.
They’d pick the prettiest of the bunch,
filling their baskets and pails.
But they always passed by Arnie,
ignoring his whines and wails.
“Please pick me!”, Arnie would cry
each time the pickers sauntered by.
“I want to go inside with you!”,
cried Arnie till he turned bright blue.
But the pickers ignored him day after day,
while Arnie hung there in dismay,
trying to nurse his shattered pride,
dying to be picked to be taken inside.
Each new dawn he’d do a trick
like spinning around on his twig.
But the picky pickers never stopped
for apples that weren’t big
or juicy or red or bright or sweet.
Poor Arnie was none of these things.
He wasn’t completely quite full grown
and he had some nicks and dings.
He dreamed what it was like inside;
lights and music all around.
Arnie just wanted to go there so badly
he flung himself to the ground.
The next day the pickers came along
and saw him lying there.
They took him inside and Arnie thought,
“This is it! I’m finally there!”
But when Arnie the Apple looked around
he realized his dreams were false,
’cause in less than 15 minutes
he was Arnie Applesauce.
(C) 1998, Arden Davidson
http://www.angelfire.com/md/byme/pocket.html
Mind my Unguarded Brain
Johnny was a barber; he loved his job, he did,
Cutting people’s hair and mowing other wigs.
Until one day he reeled back, shocked by what he saw,
A hole in the head of a customer, a man so old and poor,
Why don’t you go to the doctor? he asked the man out loud,
To get it fixed, filled in quick, that’s what I’d do, he cried,
No, I can’t do that, the old man then answered him,
I’ve had it there for forty years; it’s a part of me, he grinned,
I would miss that hole in my head; he went on to explain,
Please trim my hair but mind my unguarded brain.
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It’s the way I tell ’em, so it is!
Tins and Junk
Tins and junk, so good to eat,
And garbage scraps are tasty treats.
Trolls swear by them; I’ll try a bit,
They taste SO BAD I am going to be sick.
British General Election
Vote For Bean
Vote for Bean,
You know it makes sense,
And if it DOESN’T make sense,
It’s a load of NONSENSE.
There once was a mouse quite sweet
There once was a mouse quite sweet,
That scuttled down a dark street,
Then if fell down a hole,
And broke its big toe,
The mouse with clumsy lead feet.
There once was a dog quite bold
There once was a dog quite bold,
That thought it was fun to hold,
Little cats by the tail,
Then it exhaled a LOUD wail,
With a bloody and very sore nose.
Giggle My Boots
Giggle My Boots
Giggle my boots, gaggle my hat,
Goggle my shirtsleeves and fraggle that cat.
I am friggled with laughter, for I know that it’s true,
That you really do love me and not Johnny Lazoo.
You see, Johnny Lazoo, a man of some strength,
Wanted to court you, wanted to bend,
Your ear with his stories, your eye with his looks,
But you never gave him as much as one look.
The day that you said, Yes, I’ll marry you, I will,
Was the happiest day of my life; it was brill,
To think that you chose me over Johnny Lazoo,
Makes me friggle with laughter knowing it’s true.
Before I head off with my bride and my life,
I will give you this piece of excellent advice.
If you are planning to woo your beau, here’s the rub,
Friggle her with laughter and griggle her with love.
The Crazymad Writer Writes Again 