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The Man with a Hippo on His Head

There once was a man (quite respectable, too)
Who awoke with a problem he hadn’t a clue:
A baby hippo,
Quite small for a hippo,
Was sitting up top like a hat made of goo.

It snorted politely and yawned with a plop,
Then wiggled its toes and refused to get off.
“I’m late for my tea!”
Cried the man, urgently,
But the hippo just drooled and went plopity-plop.

He tried hats and ladders and standing quite still,
He tried reasoning gently and shouting with will.
But the hippo said “No,”
In a voice very slow,
And munched on his hair like a casual meal.

They walked through the town with a wobble and sway,
Past people who stared in a terribly polite way.
“Is it fashion?” they said,
Pointing up at his head,
Or “Perhaps it’s a Tuesday,” then shuffled away.

At last, tired of balance and hippoish weight,
The man sighed, “I suppose this is simply my fate.”
So he bought two new shoes,
One umbrella for snooze,
And a biscuit for hippos (they’re partial to eight).

Now they’re quite the pair, as odd pairs often are:
A man with ambition, a hippo who snores.
And if you should meet them,
Do try not to greet them—
Just nod, and move on, and ask nothing more.


 

 
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Posted by on January 12, 2026 in funny story

 

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Alice and the Baby Hippo (A whimsical poem in rhyme)

Alice and the Baby Hippo (A whimsical poem in rhyme)

Alice and the Baby Hippo
(A whimsical poem in rhyme)

One dainty day beneath the sun,
Young Alice thought, “This could be fun!”
She saw a hippo, small and round,
Just waddling gently on the ground.

Its skin was grey, its tail went flip,
It wriggled with a wobbly skip.
Its ears were tiny, pink and proud—
It snorted once and drew a crowd.

“A mount!” cried Alice. “Oh, how grand!
I’ll ride across this soggy land!
No horse or donkey, goat or yak—
I’ve found a hippo for my back!”

She climbed atop its chubby rear,
The hippo blinked, then twitched an ear.
It gave a squeal, then took a dash—
And Alice flew off with a splash!

She landed in a muddy bog,
Just shy of hitting a startled frog.
Her hair was filled with weeds and goo—
Her sock was gone, her shoe was too.

The hippo, shocked by all the fuss,
Just blinked and snorted, “Don’t blame us!
We’re not for riding, no, not yet—
We’re more like mobile lumps of wet.”

Alice laughed, then bowed with grace,
Mud dripping gently down her face.
“Well thank you, friend,” she said, and grinned,
“As far as rides go—you were…wind!”

And off she skipped with squelchy feet,
Through meadows green and puddles sweet.
Behind, the hippo gave a sigh,
Then belly-flopped with glee nearby.

So if you spy a hippo small,
Be sure you ask, before you fall.
For though they’re cute and seem just right—
They’re not the steed for your next flight!

 

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