Castleknock Henry went for a pee,
On a fine morning in May,
When he had finished,
He grinned and then grimaced,
At having chosen a rose bush that day.
Author Archives: The Crazymad Writer
Cool is my game
I am Henry, a cat, and cool is my game,
Strutting through Castleknock, looking for dames,
Sweet chicks to fondle pamper and delight,
Meowing them sweetly while giving the eye,
It’s a cat thing I do, please try to understand,
It’s why I am here in this fair and green land,
Creating my offspring, far too many to count,
I have to dash off now; I see a cat I can mount.
Castleknock Henry
Castleknock Henry is a fine cat,
Enjoying his food while getting quite fat,
Off to the garden he sets off in hast,
To find a nice spot to dispose of his waste,
Around and around the garden he goes,
But all that he finds is cobblelock woes,
Oh, why is there nowhere to shit?
He hisses and spits, feeling quite sick,
This garden is not cat-friendly at all,
He snaps as he finally drops his big haul,
What have you done to my garden so grand?
Says Maria, his owner, this is not part of my plan,
A garden that needs no work to put in,
Take that and that you horrible thing!
Donald Trump
Trump, Trump, Trump
To the USA a media circus came,
Searching for the new president,
Donald said, Trump is the name!
One bright day he got out of bed,
And set off for Washington,
Though crazy in the head.
[Chorus:]
Republican hopeful packed his trunk,
And said hello to the media circus,
Off he went with Trumpety Trump,
Trump Trump Trump.
Republican hopeful packed his trunk,
And joined the media circus,
Off he went with Trumpety Trump,
Trump Trump Trump.
Day by day Trump danced to the circus band,
When Donald was leading the ratings,
He felt so proud and grand.
The stunts that Donald performed,
Showed how he could take a bow,
While creating such a storm.
The best job in the land was calling,
Urging him further on,
Donald loved the run, loved the fun,
On the way to Washington,
Donald J Trump packed his trunk,
And said hello to the circus
Off he went with a Trumpety Trump,
Trump, Trump, Trump
[Chorus:]
Republican hopeful packed his trunk,
And joined the media circus,
Off he went with Trumpety Trump,
Trump Trump Trump.
Republican hopeful packed his trunk,
And joined the media circus,
Off he went with Trumpety Trump,
Trump Trump Trump.
American war machine of mass destruction
American War Machine
Of Mass Destruction
A Weapon of Mass Destruction
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin
We wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year
Now bring us some figgy pudding
Now bring us some figgy pudding
Now bring us some figgy pudding
And a cup of good cheer
We won’t go until we get some
We won’t go until we get some
We won’t go until we get some
So bring it right here
So bring us some figgy pudding
So bring us some figgy pudding
So bring us some figgy pudding
And bring it right here
Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin
We wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year
Dear Megan O’keeffe
From Father Christmas’ Workshop, The North Pole
Dear Megan,
Ho ho ho, it’s almost Christmas. Thank you so much for the letter you sent to me. I have read it from beginning to end and will do all that I can to give you the presents you would like to receive. Moreover, why shouldn’t I because you have been a really good child the entire year! Although it’s not looking at all like you are going to get a white Christmas over there in Ireland it will surely be a white Christmas here at the top of the world. Truthfully, it’s white here every day of the year! Yes, I know that some people and children alike think I live in Lapland, but in all honesty that is only a base, one of many I use to get the children’s presents to them on time each Christmas Eve.
Well, Megan, I had better sign off for now as I still have a lot to do before I set off this coming Christmas Eve.
From,
Santa, Father Christmas, for sure.
PS My favourite tipple and treat is mince pie and a glass of brandy.
Dear Molly O’keeffe
From Father Christmas’ Workshop, The North Pole
Dear Molly,
Well here I am again, another year older, writing to you before I set off on yet another journey of wonderment this coming Christmas Eve. Are you still there? For in all honestly your letter is very late getting to me this year! A little bird told me – or was it one of my reindeer? – that you would like some surprise presents this year. I hope that is true for I have one or two really nice ones ready to go into my sack before I set off for Ireland on Christmas Eve.
Don’t forget to have all of your Christmas decorations up with the lights on your Christmas tree shining brightly, as a beacon to my reindeer, to help them spot your house on the ever so dark night before Christmas. I had better go now as one of my elves has a tooth aches, that he wants me to help him with, pulling it out.
From,
Santa, Father Christmas, for sure
The Crazymad Writer Writes Again 