funny poem | The Crazymad Writer Writes Again

He caught bird flu though he don’t even fly…

Troll Bolf lies heavy, feeling so frail,
His strength now wanes, a silent, grim tale.
A dreadful misfortune has darkened his day,
And mystery looms—what could it be, pray?

He caught bird flu, though no wings to soar,
A puzzling illness he’s never known before.
He blows his nose with a shuddering gasp,
Wipes his tired eyes in a quiet, sad clasp.

In shadows of sickness, hopes flicker dim,
Yet strength resides deep within his grim,
Though peril may threaten, he refuses to yield,
For courage and love refuse to be concealed.

So heal, brave Troll Bolf, rise from despair,
Let health and joy chase away the dark glare—
For even in sickness, the spirit may soar,
And brighter tomorrows await to restore.

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Ireland is calling…

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on July 2, 2025 in children's stories, free, free ebooks, humor, humour, poems, Stories for children

Tags: bolf, ebooks, free eBook, funny poem, funny song, Ireland, troll

A Man with a Match

27 Jun

The Matchmaker’s Mirth

There once was a man with a match,

Who dreamed he could set fire to scratch;

He flicked with delight,

In the glow of the night,

Then ignited his coat — what a catch!

With sparks flying high in the air,

He laughed at the curious stare;

“My wardrobe’s on fire!

What a laugh and a choir!

A bold fashion statement, I swear!”

So off he danced under the moon,

His jacket ablaze like a tune;

With each wobbly jig,

“Can you dance too?” he’d dig—

“Just don’t try this at home anytime soon!”

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on June 27, 2025 in funny story, humour, limerick

Tags: funny poem, limerick

There once was a man with a hat

27 Jun

The Man with a Hat

There once was a man with a hat,

Who fancied he looked quite the brat.

He danced with a twist,

And laughed with a fist,

“Oh look at me! Who needs a cat?”

His hat was of colors so bright,

A rainbow that sparkled in light.

With each jolly step, He’d skip and he leapt,

Creating pure joy at first sight.

Around him, the children would play,

For laughter would brighten their day.

So they’d follow his lead,

In dance and in deed,

A whimsical show on display!

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on June 27, 2025 in funny story, humour, limerick, poems

Tags: funny poem, limerick

I Have a Little Satnav, by Pam Ayres

14 Sep

I have a little Satnav; it sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver’s friend it tells you where you are.

I have a little Satnav; I’ve had it all my life
It’s better than the normal ones, My Satnav is my wife.

It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive
“It’s sixty miles an hour”, it says, “You’re doing sixty five”.

It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake
And tells me that it’s never ever, Safe to overtake.

It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively, Just when to intervene.

It lists the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear
And taking this into account, It specifies my gear.

I’m sure no other driver, has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car, It still gives its advice.

It fills me up with counselling, each journey’s pretty fraught
So why don’t I exchange it, And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, Makes sure I’m properly fed
It washes all my shirts and things, and keeps me warm in bed!

Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then, I could turn the bugger off

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on September 14, 2015 in funny story, humor, humour, poems

Tags: funny poem, pam ayres, satnav

Wee Willie Winkie
Runs through the town,
Upstairs and downstairs in his night gown,
Rapping at the windows,
Crying through the locks,
I’ve lost my keys, my feet are cold,
THERE ARE HOLES IN MY SOCKS!

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on September 9, 2015 in funny story, humor, humour, nursery rhymes, poems

Tags: funny poem, Nursery rhyme, willie winkie

Mind my Unguarded Brain

27 Apr

Johnny was a barber; he loved his job, he did,
Cutting people’s hair and mowing other wigs.
Until one day he reeled back, shocked by what he saw,
A hole in the head of a customer, a man so old and poor,
Why don’t you go to the doctor? he asked the man out loud,
To get it fixed, filled in quick, that’s what I’d do, he cried,
No, I can’t do that, the old man then answered him,
I’ve had it there for forty years; it’s a part of me, he grinned,
I would miss that hole in my head; he went on to explain,
Please trim my hair but mind my unguarded brain.

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It’s the way I tell ’em, so it is!

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Posted by The Crazymad Writer on April 27, 2015 in eBook download, free, free ebooks, funny story, humor, humour

Tags: free ebooks, funny poem

Giggle My Boots

12 Mar

Giggle My Boots

Giggle my boots, gaggle my hat,
Goggle my shirtsleeves and fraggle that cat.
I am friggled with laughter, for I know that it’s true,
That you really do love me and not Johnny Lazoo.

You see, Johnny Lazoo, a man of some strength,
Wanted to court you, wanted to bend,
Your ear with his stories, your eye with his looks,
But you never gave him as much as one look.

The day that you said, Yes, I’ll marry you, I will,
Was the happiest day of my life; it was brill,
To think that you chose me over Johnny Lazoo,
Makes me friggle with laughter knowing it’s true.

Before I head off with my bride and my life,
I will give you this piece of excellent advice.
If you are planning to woo your beau, here’s the rub,
Friggle her with laughter and griggle her with love.